It seems that Scotland’s ‘jolly fat man’ Alex Salmond has concerns about his personal safety.
To that end John Buchanan, a sergeant at Police Scotland has been seconded to the Scottish Government.
Does Buchanan have knowledge of dieting?
In trying to build up Salmond as a ‘statesman’, it seems the SNP Government want all the trappings, a bit like having Turkey at Xmas, you need all the trimmings thrown in.
Is Scotland’s ‘jolly fat man’ in danger?
Only of self inflicted helpings of multiple puddings, curries and pies.
On White paper day I visited Holyrood, I thought to myself, this wasn’t a safe area, a professional would see the high ground as a marvelous place for a sniper team to pick someone off.
Given the distance, the Barrett sniper rifle is an ideal weapon platform if someone wanted to pick off a politician.
50 calibre rounds do an amazing job as we have all seen on youtube.
Sgt Buchanan is also an officer with experience of firearms incidents, what about pie throwing?
What about egg throwing?
So, as part of finding something to do, he has reviewed security arrangements in Bute House and the First Minister's home in Aberdeenshire.
I guess contractors will be in soon to start work on building the ‘bunkers’ if this hasn’t happened already.
Buchanan has touched on security protocol when Salmond is on walkabout, and probably came up with the conclusion that isn’t safe either since there aren’t multiple layers of security, such as at secure locations such as the Scottish Parliament.
Sgt Buchanan is now based in the First Minister's private office as a "security liaison officer".
Poor bastard must be bored out of his mind.
It’s a non job, but since he has to earn a crust, he scopes out potential threats and plans for events attended by Salmond.
This includes deciding on the best entrance for the First Minister to use to avoid being booed by the public.
Maybe he also checks the toilets and tests the food as well!
What is extremely amusing is that Buchanan was part of the Government entourage that visited China in November.
The Chinese are particularly good at close protection and event management, Buchanan would have had absolutely nothing to do.
I wonder if he saw the Great Wall of China!
And without an equipped security team would be just another bystander, equipped means carrying weapons, that’s Glocks to the ignorant.
A Police Scotland spokesman said the role did not amount to a bodyguard.
I take that to mean after discussions with Buchanan, he declared he wasn’t prepared to take a bullet for the First Minister but would be willing to be an expert witness if required.
Labour chief whip Macdonald said:
"Alex Salmond's approval ratings may be going down, but his opinion of his own importance only ever goes up."
A Police spokesman said:
"Following a review of security surrounding the First Minister for Scotland, a security liaison officer from Police Scotland has been seconded to the office of the First Minister. The role of this officer is to provide advice and guidance on physical and protective security measures, including visits and events, in relation to the First Minister."
A Scottish Government spokesman said:
"We do not comment on security issues."
Probably because they don’t know what they are talking about much like Alex Salmond and unpopular Nicola Sturgeon on European Union membership.
The Campaign for Human Rights at Glasgow University